


No Nicer Witch Than You

by Mephilia_Venus



Category: Bayonetta (Video Games)
Genre: F/F, Halloween, but i do seem to write bayo bottoming for jeanne a lot, in my personal canon they're both vers, liberal references to jeanne being a teacher because you can pry that from my cold dead hands
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-08
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 11:35:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29916288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mephilia_Venus/pseuds/Mephilia_Venus
Summary: a home for my various BayoJeanne oneshots from throughout the years
Relationships: Bayonetta/Jeanne (Bayonetta), Cereza/Jeanne (Bayonetta)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 9





	No Nicer Witch Than You

In centuries past, this had been the most sacred of nights for the Umbra Witches. On this night, the newest Witches who had completed their training would have chosen a demon to contract. On this night over five hundred years ago, Cereza had made her pact with Madama Butterfly. On this night, even the most powerful of angels stayed in Paradiso.

Even now, thousands of miles from Vigrid, with almost all of her kin lost to Inferno, Cereza could still feel her magic thrumming through her veins as it only did on this night.

But most importantly, it was the first year that she had been able to spend this night with Jeanne in five centuries.

They had already poured the wine and raised a toast to their fallen sisters at The Gates of Hell, and now partook in their own celebration - one that consisted of donning human “witch” costumes, opening a bag of chocolates, and putting a Halloween playlist that Cereza had created on at full volume.

“Really, who would have thought that humans would come around to Halloween so much?” Jeanne remarked as she opened a bottle of wine. “Only three hundred years ago, you would be accused of being the town witch if you went out at all on your own tonight, and now here they are, treating it as a beloved holiday.”

“Well, they would have gotten one thing right, in our case,” Cereza responded. “Although I do wonder how humans came up with these images of a witch’s outfit.”

Tonight they had opted to swap color schemes. Cereza had gone on an outing to a costume store earlier in the week and chosen a costume named “Scarlet Enchantress” - a low-cut, blood red gown with a black corset and matching cloak. Ridiculous as it was, Cereza had found herself growing quickly attached to the ensemble.

Jeanne, on the other hand, had gone through their closets to piece together what she had dubbed a “modern” version of an Umbran combat outfit, although Cereza felt that the broom and vintage hat still leaned closer to a human's concept of "witch". Regardless, she wasn't about to turn down the opportunity to watch Jeanne walk around their apartment in extremely form-fitting black jeans and stiletto boots all evening.

As the stereo switched to a slower, jazzier piece, Cereza crossed her legs on the couch, taking full advantage of the slit up her dress. “You know, Jeanne, I feel like we’re not really celebrating this night as much as we could be.”

Jeanne looked up from theit kitchen, and Cereza saw the desire enter her eyes. Smiling, Jeanne asked, “Then what do you suggest, Cereza?”

Cereza pretended to ponder the question. “As much as I’ve come around to this costume, I think I may have laced the corset a touch too tight. Could you be a dear and help loosen it for me?”

“For the record, I think you look absolutely smashing in that number,” Jeanne commented, but she still crossed the floor between the kitchen and living room awfully quick. Sitting next to Cereza, Jeanne reached beneath the black cloak and began to slowly unlace the corset. Even through two layers of fabric, her touch still sent shockwaves running up Cereza’s spine. Restraint be damned, Cereza wanted Jeanne to take her right on this couch, both of them still in their tawdry costumes. Jeanne’s fingers were agonizingly slow as they worked their way down her back, until finally, Cereza felt the corset loosen around her stomach.

“Is that better?” Jeanne murmured in her ear, and Cereza reached her limit. Shifting her body, she pressed her lips to Jeanne’s before she could stand back up, running her hand up Jeanne’s leg. Jeanne let out a soft groan and let Cereza pull her down. Cereza began to press her fingertips harder against Jeanne’s thigh, when a cacophonous ringing sounded through the apartment.

They separated as Jeanne glared in the direction of the door, offended that it would dare to interrupt them. “What in the seven levels of Inferno is that?”

“Doorbell,” Cereza smirked. “It would seem we have company.” Untangling herself from Jeanne, Cereza straightened her costume on the way to the door. Upon opening it, she looked down to a young girl in a blue dress, and an older teenager in a cheerleader costume who Cereza assumed was her sister.

“Go on, what do you say?” the older girl prompted her sister.

The young girl stared up at Cereza for a moment before holding out an orange and black bag. “Um, trick or treat!”

_“Ah, that’s right,”_ Cereza thought. Their building did allow trick-or-treating, but she hadn’t expected many children to come all the way up to the penthouses. She had to admire this one’s dedication to the holiday, especially since her bag already looked quite full.

“What is going on, Cereza?” Jeanne asked from behind her, but she was spared the explanation when the girl’s sister sputtered out, “Professor Jeanne? You live in our building?”

Cereza made way for Jeanne to stand in the doorway, whose expression was now mingled with surprise. “Oh. Good evening, Serena,” Jeanne replied. “And yes, it would seem I do.”

“You’re one of my sister’s teachers?” the little girl asked, still holding out her candy bag expectantly.

“Yes, Zoey, she is.” Serena bent down next to her sister. “Now why don’t you tell them who you are?”

“I’m Alice in Wonderland!” Zoey said. Jeanne looked at Cereza helplessly. Taking the hint, Cereza rushed back to the kitchen to search for anything resembling Halloween candy that hadn’t already been broken into. Her eyes darted around the room before landing on a full-size Snickers bar.

_“Well, we’re about to make one little girl’s night,”_ Cereza thought as she snatched it up. Walking back to the door, she interrupted a conversation about a project that Serena was working on to drop the chocolate into Zoey’s bag. “There you are, little one. Have a very happy Halloween.”

Zoey’s eyes lit up as she beheld the candy. “Thank you, miss! This is way better than anything else I got tonight!”

“Alright now, say goodbye to Professor Jeanne!” Serena placed a hand on Zoey’s back and began shepherding her back down the hall. “It was, um, nice to see you, Professor.”

Closing the door, Cereza grinned, looking back at Jeanne. “She seemed nice.”

“Don’t you start on me,” Jeanne said. “You know I leave my work in the elevator. Now, where were we?”

Cereza felt two hands pressing against her shoulders, and she was up against the door. Tangling her hand in Jeanne’s hair, Cereza gladly sunk into her kiss. They broke apart long enough for Cereza to comment, “You really need to wear black more often,” before the heat of Jeanne’s gaze stole any other words away.

Jeanne began to move her knee between Cereza’s legs, and Cereza kept her lips locked with Jeanne’s like her life depended on it. Pressed against the door of their penthouse, Cereza would have gladly let herself sink into the sweet oblivion of Jeanne - were it not for another knock at the door.

Breaking apart once again, Cereza heard Jeanne mutter, “For fuck’s sake,” before Cereza opened the door to reveal another small child, a boy in a pirate costume this time. “Zoey said there were two witches on the top floor giving out candy bars!” he exclaimed. “Oh, trick or treat!”

Another mad dash to the kitchen yielded a chocolate bar that neither of them had somehow touched. At the last moment, Cereza thought to ask the boy if he was allergic to nuts. He shook his head no, and seemed somehow even more excited over his candy than Zoey had been.

“I’m gonna tell all my friends about you two! You ladies are awesome!” he declared as he ran back down the hall. Cereza looked at Jeanne, trying not to laugh.

“Unless being interrupted by children every two minutes for the rest of the night is going to somehow enhance the experience for you, I recommend that we think of a solution quickly,” Cereza remarked.

And so it came to pass that when a small mob of children arrived on the top floor and clustered outside the door of the full-size candy bar apartment, they found a large bowl full of every Halloween treat imaginable, topped with a note reading, _“Be fair and only take one - or else the Halloween witches will get you!”_

Inside, two witch costumes lay in a heap on the floor, as the last true witches on Earth celebrated their night in the best way they knew how.


End file.
